When

 

When life rhythms doesn't actually sound no more like duduke

When you hate the sight of sunrise because you gave up already on the day unfolding since last night when you soaked your pillows drenched

When the cover of darkness is the safest place you felt at peace; far from all preying eyes, probing questions at every turn all fuelled not by care or compassion but to confirm and satisfy their thirst for stories of your failure

When your silent outer self is an exact opposite of the raging war happening in the inside, yet wrapped around a smile as you trod past memories of sweet before all but gone in the fleeting moments

When conversations became sour, chaotic and a battle of who is wrong or right, all aimed to massage a battered ego bruised and scared from previous encounters on the alter of moral justification fanned  

When the voices, the only voices that you hear, that sound like songs and meaningful to you only lead to a place of darkness with no light in sight

When you look so closely, you see friends and foe and can’t tell which you should embrace for they all appear with tongues as weapons ready to strike deep with no remorse for your gut feeling

When the best wishes, decisions only echo “give up” “surrender”  “you can’t make it”. “its over”, at that point, if only you can take a moment and appreciate the last breathe and realise how special you are and privileged to be able to have one more go through your nostrils

You realise if you can do that alone, all by yourself, then you are all  you need to make it, make it through the challenges no matter how overwhelming because the journey to survival and happiness first starts from a willing mind and not a hopeless being

No matter what you lose, do not lose hope in God, in it, the greatest survival and success stories have emerged. Yours can be the next but only if you let hope a place in your heart.

Bless